Figuring Out Who I Want to Become

This last year since I graduated from college has been pretty trying to say the least. I’ve been doing a lot of what I guess could be called soul-searching and don’t feel any more enlightened now than I did a year ago. Well, that’s not entirely true. I’ve dealt with a few hardships in the past year that I had been dreading for a while and I think I’m stronger for it. I’ve said goodbye to parts of my life that I loved (and some I didn’t love so much) and am now trying to figure out what to do next or who I am now. But I don’t really like that phrase. People say it a lot, that they are “figuring out who they are” but I think that’s not entirely accurate. I know who I am now, even the qualities that I don’t like to admit to, I still know they’re there. But what I think we all mean when we use the phrase is that we’re trying to figure out who we want to become and how to get there. For me, I want to become someone who is content to be on a journey rather than always looking for a destination. I’ve always been someone who likes to finish things and check them off some mental checklist, but I’ve never figured out how to just be. I want to learn to live in the now rather than continuously worrying about the future. It will take patience, something I don’t have a lot of, but I intend to work on it.

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